Cold and Flu Season is Here...

Seriously, does someone release millions of viruses each year around this time or what?  I think we get like one week in between illnesses and then we're down again.  Needless to say, blogging isn't at the top of the list these days.

Mostly my day looks like this:

Yeah...runny noses, TV watching, attack of the booger covered children.

The last cold we had for TWO WEEKS.  You read that right, two weeks.  This week the kiddos are healthy, but I got a lovely stomach virus - Yippee!  That disaster has receded, but now I am hacking up a lung as I write this...cough drops are overrated.

Besides surviving living in a petri dish, we've had other stuff going on.  Hayden's last day of his speech program was last Friday.  Woohoo!  He graduated out of his program and is no longer labeled as having a disability!  My chatterbox is officially normal - as if I didn't know that.  Kid will talk your ears off.

Poor Corbin was too sick to get his tests done last month so they've been rescheduled for November 19th.  I'm keeping him in a bubble for two weeks before these next tests because if he misses this one, the next available appointment is in February!!  Argh.  But I dragged myself this morning to his followup with is neuro and she says he's looking great!  She's thinks the MRI should come back normal and she's really interesting in seeing what the hearing test says - but we'll see.

His therapies are going well, but heaven help us when he gets sick.  Basically, once he's well we have to cram in all the appointments he missed and it turns into a gigantic "therapy" week.  It's crazy.

For the first time, Hayden knew exactly what he wanted to be for Halloween - a bee!  Unfortunately, bee costumes are mostly made for babies and toddlers, but we managed to cram his 4T-5T body into a 3/4T.  It's hilarious - but he loves it.

Hehehehe.

Corbin will be a fireman...I think.   We've yet to get him to keep it on for longer than 3 seconds.  He might be an "off duty" fireman.

Mark's new job has a Halloween event on Friday and Sunday we'll hit up a few neighbors as well as some of our church's block parties.

Hopefully we'll all be well enough to enjoy this weekend.

What are your Halloween plans? 

I'm an outdoor mom

I've come to realize that I'm an outdoor mom. I much prefer to spend my days outside with my boys than stay cooped up inside all day with two crazy monkeys.

Maybe it's because I have two BOYS... I don't know, but dealing with them all day within the confines of our house is maddening.

The fighting, whining, crying, etc is just too much to take some days.

But nice long days spent outside getting dirty, sweaty, rough and tumble boys is just what they need.

They play hard, have lots of fun, nature adventures and go to bed happy...and so do I.

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Taking off our Goggles

Haha. So I got a lot of different reactions to my Unplugging post (most specifically about FB) and it left me thinking. Which is good - that's why I love your comments. We all live such different lives and come through different experiences to get us where we are right now. I love that.

We each have our own unique perspective on the world and until someone pulls off our "goggles" and let's us try on theirs - we sometimes miss that not everything works or is "good" for someone else. I think that's one of the things that can bother me the most about blogs and FB - negativity and judgments.

Here's a small example of what I'm talking about:

A while back, I came across a post on a blog I read regularly that was pretty critical and judgmental, and even a bit proud and boastful. The content of the post was about taking your kids to the dentist and and how well her child behaved - so much so that the dentist complemented her on it. She then contrasted that with another child she saw throwing a fit in another room. From that she went on to bullet points on why she was a good parent and inferring probably why this other child was having difficulties.

The "abridged" version of the points:

1. It starts with good parenting.
2. We don't project our feelings onto our kids.
3. We prepare them in advance for what will happen, and I tell them what is expected of them.
4. We don't ever mention needles, or fear, or drills.
5. We really praise them for doing a good job after.

(Another point was that her kids don't watch a lot of TV - a hot topic among moms - and that they liked watching the shows at the dentist more than other kids because of that).

These, of course, are all wonderful points for preparing your child for the dentist.

However, is the comparing and judging of other children really necessary? In our day, we see a "snapshot" of some else's life...not the full picture - we have no idea what's truly going on in the next office over and patting ourselves on the back for being "better" than another parent is a bad habit to get into (believe me, I'm guilty of it too!!).

And so, I needed to give her my "goggles" to adjust her perspective, so I sent her this:

I think experiences are also a factor. My son has had a lot of doctor visits, surgeries, tests, hospital stays and poking and prodding for all three years of his life. All of this has added up to him having a general fear of all doctor related visits, because despite any confidence building - most of his visits DO hurt or are uncomfortable (i.e. shots, drawing blood, ear drum vibration tests, people holding him down against his will).

At this point, even bribery has no effect, let alone talking about what will happen. I'm afraid it will take him longer to get over this.

Also, if they have language and hearing disabilities, sometimes there is no way to prepare them for what to expect - which was our case for 2 1/2 of those years.

We try to measure it in small improvements. At this point he is now able to have a conversation about seeing doctors without fear and even sit in the office waiting without getting upset beforehand.

I can't wait for the day he'd sit in a dentist chair! That would be a huge milestone.

Perspective adjusted! And once she read this comment, the light bulb came on and she was very gracious and seemed to understand this "new" perspective.

But, this is often the case over and over again on FB and blogs. Having two special needs children is a different experience and gives you different "goggles". You often read statements that leave your jaw hanging open and saying "But...but...what about...that's not a fair judgment...etc".

You understand that the "crazy, out of control, tantruming" child may not just be "a brat" or product of crappy parenting, but might be coping with massive frustration combined with the inability to speak or communicate on top of being a two year old (which is frustrating enough, HA!). The child who literally RUNS out of the ER crying might not just be disobedient, but may have memories of his last hospital stay where he had to stay in a crib for 2 days with wires attached to his foot and a tube taped to his face.

And, of course, this is not limited to children. We all have different experiences and reasons for what we do and it's so important that we remember that! What works for us, may not work for all.

And yet, FB and blogs are not all bad! I've been able to connect and stay in touch with friends across the planet! I'm able get a glimpse into the lives of my friends even if we can't just drive over for dinner. I get to see my friend's kids grow up before my eyes in pictures and blogs and feel like I got to be a small part of it. Those are all wonderful things and I shouldn't forget that, or exclude my friends from being apart of our lives as well!

So, while there are obviously some things that I don't like (and this post only mentions one), I also feel there are enough positive aspects to continue using FB in a limited way! Just enough to keep up with my far-away friends and to post some updates now and again to keep in touch! Mark got me a new phone this month that should help me use FB in a balanced way, so I'm able to still update but without it taking up too much time!

So there. My perspective has been adjusted.