Thursday, July 5, 2007


Over the past few days I've been thinking about all the wonderful subjects I could blog about. And since I'm terribly opinionated, there were many. I think I'm even blogging in my head. But, today a new situation popped up that brought everything I've been thinking about together.

Some of you...I think...may be wondering where all these topics come from? Is my blog directed at someone in particular? Am I angry at something? Am I disapproving of someone? Hmmm...good questions. I will attempt to answer all these and more!

Important Point #1 (and only):

My friends read this blog. I hope.

This means that I cannot bitch about my friends on this blog. Well, I guess I could. But then I'd be an idiot with no friends. And I'm not denying the desire to bitch. I think a lot of us have it (us being a general term, no particular person in mind). I admire greatly those (again general, but definitely not including myself) who do not possess this difficult to break habit.

So what do I do with this desire? I may bitch about the person to another friend (totally bad habit) or to my husband (who doesn't care). But when it comes to blogging, I always do this...I take that issue and internalize it. Why don't I like it? Is it because it remind me of something I do? Or a bad trait I have? Generally the answer is yes. So, even though the original thought came from them, I soon realize that my offenses are FAR worse than theirs, and it's really me I should be bitching about. I discover horrible traits and qualities in myself that I didn't even know were there.

Here's an example: Let's say my bitch starts out with a friend using a mobile device too much (which we all acknowledge and kid about). And trust me, if you're thinking "She's talking about me!!!" You're right. All of you mobile abusers!! You're not alone. It's an epidemic, not an isolated case with my friends. I think about that habit and look at myself. What about me? What am I doing? I'm blogging about spending time with Hayden, instead of actually spending time with Hayden!!! Eeek. I'm taking and posting pics of my baby instead of enjoying him. I'm checking email and chatting all day, I'm a wreck. Much worse then my mobile friends.

A little side note, Hayden is napping in the swing and he just started laughing in his sleep. Melts my heart.

But here's the moral of today's lesson: I am a messed up and imperfect person. Which is painfully obvious if you read this blog. I'm trying to fix things (with the help of God, cause doing it on my own has shown no improvement). I also need to develop more interests, so I spend less time in other people's lives and more time in my own. And that is just what I'm going to do, good day!

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