I'm trying to keep it all together. I can fix this. I can make this better. I can survive this. I can be stronger.
Why are you trying to earn grace?
I can't possible deserve it. I need to deserve. It's not fair to be undeserving. I can make you love me. I can do better. I can try harder.
Why are you crying?
I can't fix it. I have no control. I need things to be ok. I need to be free of this pain. I need release.
Let me lift up your face, just don't turn away
Why do I turn away from You? Why do I hide from You?
Why are you looking for love?
I want my fairytale. I need a protector. I need a savior.
Why are you still searching as if I'm not enough?
I look for Him everywhere but in You. I can't see you. I can't feel you. I can't hear you.
To where will you go child?
I've nowhere to go.
Tell me where will you run?
I run every night, escaping my thoughts through the pounding of the pavement, but there's no place to run to that cures me.
To where will you run?
I run looking for You.
And I'll be by your side, wherever you fall
Are you there?
In the dead of night, whenever you call
And please don't fight, these hands that are holding you
I won't let you hold me. I can't. I can't release it all. What if You let go? But I'm just so tired of fighting.
My hands are holding you
Look at these hands and my side
They swallowed the grave on that night
When I drank the world's sin
So I could carry you in
And give you life
I want to give you life
Cause I, I love you
I want you to know that I, I love you
I'll never let you go
Lyrics in italics: By Your Side, Tenth Avenue North
It's a free gift. It's not about laws or being good. It's not about who's right or who's wrong. It's not about "good" and "bad". It's about Him. He loves you. He is love.