Tuesday, May 13, 2008

A Good Day

Today is turning into another good day for me. Still keeping up the energy! Woot. I even got to bed late last night and woke up early again with Hayden this morning.

I'm enjoying the weather. Overcast and looking like it's about to rain. These are those lazy days I used to dream about when I was working. Whenever it was rainy and gloomy, I used to sit in my office wishing I was sitting at home, drinking some tea, and reading a good book. I used to have this little decorative glass ornament in my office that had the coziest looking arm chair on it and it said "No place like home" or something like that. I'll have to dig it out one day. Haha, it's been about 20 months and I still haven't unpacked my box from work. I guess that makes sense since I don't really need any of that stuff. It's funny how important it all seemed when I left. Now I think I could toss most of it and not even blink. Even the scripts and things I worked so hard on, and all the stuff I learned. I guess your priorities really change as time goes on. Different setting, different kind of work. My main concerns used to be things like getting to work on time, making sure I was dressed "business casual" enough, or making sure people knew that I was valuable/smart/whatever. Now my main concerns are the health of Hayden and Corbin, making sure Hayden is getting enough interaction and opportunities to learn and play, and making sure we all stay fed, bathed and clothed!

And it may not sound as important as being the lead QA engineer on company X's next latest release, but it's actually way more important and much more work than I've ever done in my life. Every little snuggle and kiss, and soothing each "owie", and seeing the happy look on his face when he's eating his "yum yum" is worth a million "Good Jobs". And making a great smelling dinner and looking at my actually clean kitchen beats all the reports and finished projects hands down. I love these little snippets of time during the day when the house is quiet and Hayden is pretending to nap. I love watching him play and try new things. Or taking him to the park. Or sitting in a restaurant with him, enjoying a nice bowl of soup and watching him enjoy his sandwich while he smiles at all the other customers. And I can't wait until little Corbin joins our family. Another opportunity to bond with another soul. To get to experience all the wonders of that first year all over again. Nursing, cuddling, the first smile, his little burps, wrapping him up in a little receiving blanket, learning to lift his head up, rolling over, sitting up, walking, trying new foods, it's all such a miracle to watch and a gift to be apart of. I can't wait to get that first glimpse of him. Will he have dark hair like Mark, or be another light haired baby like Hayden? Will he be chubby or skinny? What color will his eyes be? How big will he be? What will his birthday be?

So often we focus on the sleeping (or lack thereof) and crying and all the other harder parts, but we forget to mention all the joyful moments that are dotted between each hard night or each long day. We forget how hard they made us laugh or how our heart melted with their first smile or first "Mamma". And to get to have two wonderful little boys!!! I must be blessed.


Anonymous said...

If you ever want a reminder of the old life believe me I'll remind you but I'm so happy for you now. You're so content and those boys are blessed to have the best mama ever. Thanks for having lunch today with me. You were the highlight of my day. Hope you continue to enjoy the hardest job you'll ever love.

Robyn said...

I needed that "all of the wonders of the first year" bit. All of the wonders of the first week are a little overwhelming at 4 a.m. when a fussy baby doesn't want to eat, sleep, cuddle, be burped, or anything we can think of. Thanks for the perspective! :)